恶人谷

Might it not make sense, then, to comparison-proof your own life? This is one good argument for pursuing a long-held eccentric career ambition over something more conventional: if nobody else you know is a gherkin wholesaler, or a goat farmer, you're much less likely to feel gnawed by the sense of not measuring up. It might pay to pick friends with different lifestyles, too. When I hear about successes of friends who are writers, I admit, my happiness is tinged with envy. ("Every time a friend succeeds, I die a little" – Gore Vidal.) But my friend the actor, or my friend the computer programmer? For them, I'm just happy: there's no easy way to compare our achievements, so it never occurs to me to do so. Though there is one way, of course, in which anyone can compare themselves to others. Which is why friends who want to stay friends should never discuss money.

The tips in The Rules (don't call men, let them call you) or its male equivalent, The Game (subtly insult women, so they will try to prove themselves), might "work", in a narrow sense. But so might approaching strangers and asking them to sleep with you, as per the old Russian joke. ("But you'll get slapped if you do that!" "Yes, most of them slap me, but some of them…") Just because a strategy works as a numbers game doesn't mean it gets at anything true about human nature. The Wisconsin study and others suggest that some cross-sex friendships are more platonic, others less so. Some people are more manipulative, others less so. And so, boringly, on. The real harsh reality is that reality isn't always harsh.

"This may sound like a truism," writes Richard Branson in a rare moment of self-awareness in his new book Like A Virgin: Secrets They Won't Teach You At Business School, "but it has to be said: it takes an engaged, motivated and committed workforce to deliver a first-class product or service." He's right, of course, apart from the bit about it having to be said. And, to be fair, Like A Virgin is eye-opening, though not in the sense I assume its author intended: my eyes kept widening in disbelief. One of his five "secrets to starting a business", for example, is: "Be innovative." How? By "thinking up a product [that] people really want". You have to be willing to take risks; you shouldn't dwell on regrets. To be a good leader, he observes, "you have to be a great listener" and, "like the proverbial bad apple", a bad leader can destroy a company.

So as not to spoil the whole thing, I won't reveal what Branson thinks is "the real engine of any business", nor the name of a deceased entrepreneur he greatly admires. (Oh, all right then, I will! It's "people", and Steve Jobs.) There's also an impassioned chapter arguing against the War on Drugs, which has nothing to do with anything else. The subtitle isn't misleading: I'm pretty sure they don't teach any of this stuff at business school, for several good reasons.

When I hear about successes of friends who are writers, I admit, my happiness is tinged with envy. ("Every time a friend succeeds, I die a little" – Gore Vidal.) But my friend the actor, or my friend the computer programmer? For them, I'm just happy: there's no easy way to compare our achievements, so it never occurs to me to do so.

Knowing wrote:I don't know. I am never jealous of other computer programmers. What makes me envy is people doing all those things I like but not particularly talented at (Cooking, Photography, Writing Novels, to name a few), and successfully enough to make a living!

Knowing wrote:剧透的高喊：：：：：啊啊啊啊啊我就知道。。。。不过突然就不那么depressing 了！！！

Jun wrote:是吧是吧？我觉得这书设计得太精彩了，悬念和节奏非常强，好看。

Jun wrote:Montalbano 系列的有声书（美国版）很好听，翻译和朗读的人我都喜欢。

vivi wrote:有人爱看美国小白文吗？the fault in our stars 不错，有声书也很好。

幻儿 wrote:Gone Girl 10月份上映，这个电影teaser做得太棒啦！ Can't wait!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1ZbNhSnS9k
另外，作者为了电影重新写了一个结尾！！！据说书后面1/3都为电影做了改编呢。我本来就不喜欢书里的结尾，对电影更加期待了！